Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The dive

Slick hold of fear
Fear’s cold breath
Breathe a hand-span
Hands span an arrow
An arrow drawn swift
Swiftly into the water
Water’s quick grasp
Grasped in fear
Fear’s cold breath
Breath’s dying slide
Slide into the water

Rachel Westfall
January 25, 2010


Karen said...

This is an interesting form, and I like the way it moves forward into the water. Nice.

Soulfull Rhytm said...

ah the above few lines makes me realize , of the endless possibilities of little prose and poems that could be conjured to define every little consequential(or inconsequential) actions of our lives...

christopher said...

It's so easy. You make it so easy.

Slippery Slope

I won't stop, not now
that I'm headed down this slope
toward ecstacy.
Funny how pictures
show fountains, blossoms, splashes
where feelings descend
to similar depths
where all was dark, now is light,
all fear, now is joy.

RachelW said...

Karen, I'm surprised it worked at all...

Soulfull, thanks, and welcome!

Christopher, you do it so much better. I like your slope so much better than the fearful dive.

Fireblossom said...

It's like mesh, connected at intervals, one line beginning from the last and creating a whole.

So where's the lace? ;-)

Rick said...

Rach-I love the segue. One line pushed, then pulled by another. A long slow slide. Smooth. ~rick

Anonymous said...

Intriguing... very stream of consciousness, and I feel like the dive could be almost anything. But there's definitely that motion downward and the apprehension, which is protean enough for me. :)

BloggerMouth said...

Wonderful. This was so well done... love the transition from one line to another... it was seamless. I like this... a LOT.

Woman in a Window said...

I was worried. I felt the apprehension but was glad for the release at the end.