Monday, April 19, 2010

This ragged heart

In response to Christopher's poem which can be found in the comments here on this blog, two posts below:

This ragged heart

This ragged heart wears
a dirty shirt, threads
ground with dust as fine as flour
from the worrying,
worrying fingers
ravelling over this ancient grief.

Spring’s low lifting light
draws a fleeting thought
and those fingers flutter briefly
away just lightly, remembering
the pause of a dove’s
soft landing on sunlit rafters
before the dust comes
settling down, down
over this ragged heart.

Rachel Westfall
April 19, 2010


Elisabeth said...

This is a powerful poem, Rachel. I don't often comment on poetry because I feel ill equipped to make a useful contribution. But maybe it helps to know that your poem got to me. It resonates.

christopher said...

Thank you, Rachel. I wonder why this one came to me...

Departure To The Oort Cloud

I look from my post,
from orders to head far out
to the birthing cloud
beyond this solar
neighborhood, I, departing
bid you this farewell,
knowing I have left
you ragged, undone, hoping
you will find your way
to forgive me this.

Anonymous said...

No worrying. Ragged hearts have magnetic fields.

RachelW said...

Elisabeth, thank you. I appreciate it very much.

Christopher, that appeals to me; I think it's one of your best sci-fi poems. I love sci-fi. :)

Joseph, I need to think on that!

Rick said...

i read this a few times and then tried to think on how I would change it. I came up with nothing. Not sure i like the thought of a dusty heart for an ending unless it maintains at least a faint beat, but the writing was extraordinary.
away just lightly, remembering

Silver said...

i like your poem.


RachelW said...

Rick, thanks for stopping by and commenting. Much appreciated. I try not to re-read my poems too many times, because they just never quite do what I want them to, but I don't want to over-analyze them and spoil the experience for myself.

Silver, thanks muchly!

BloggerMouth said...

How do you do it?

christopher said...

Ooo. I like that last do you do it?

How do any of us do it?


This is like thinking on how to walk. You can't think on it and be graceful at the same time.

RachelW said...

Nicely put, Christopher! It's true-- think too hard about it, and it doesn't work at all.

BloggerMouth said...

I was too amazed to type anything else. I've always been a fan Rachel, always will be.

RachelW said...

Thanks, Bloggermouth; you are too kind!

Cat said...

This one was wonderful Rachel I particularly liked : ravelling over this ancient grief

Ardi K said...

no -- beautiful
i so enjoy your style

now to check out some of your followers
good poets attract
good souls